Let’s face it: Philly is no New York City and our nightlife proves that point. If you’re looking for delusional pretentiousness, pass Zee Bar your crumpled $20 bill. If you enjoy claustrophobic panic attacks, 32 Degrees is your best bet. And Philly’s "extended hours" bars are a running joke we must be forced to explain to cities where places actually stay open late.
Enter Recess Lounge. Buzz has been building since August, when their reps declared it will “bring the sparkle back to nightlife in the area.” A large claim, but sparkle it does (although you wouldn’t know it from Grub Street’s vague “preview”). The Nouveau Image CEO Michelle Miller, who is handling the lounge’s press, told us exactly why we should join the members-only hotspot. “Recess is all about fun,” she said. “We are creating an atmosphere that Philly has yet to see.” General and rehashed, yes. And since we’ve been PR-smoozed before, we went to check it out ourselves.
To her credit, she’s not kidding; no other one-word-name Philly lounge hits the nail on the head quite like Recess (yet). The theme hits you like a dodgeball to the face. Upon entry, old-school black and white photos of playgrounds and frolicking children hang in thick black frames, offering a glimpse of Americana before you hit the cocktail sliding board. A black pseudo-chalkboard wall features the urban playground’s commandments, including “I will not take my clothes off in class. I will wait till recess!” and “I will tip my bartender or I will get no playtime.” Consider your childhood playground memories tainted.
If the Recess commandments dictate how to play, the 1600s needlepoint on the opposite wall reminds us who’s allowed on the playground. The 15’ x 8’ mural depicts a wealthy Renaissance couple schmoozing over tea (before the days of Marani vodka and Swanky Bubbles) as two not-so-swanky peasants watch enviously. This decorative juxtaposition is no accident; Recess intends to keep its clientele both exclusive and playful. The one-room lounge is barely longer than your playground’s monkey bars. In the words of Miller: “We want to have a place where Philly’s best can socialize, dance, drink and have a great time.” Simple enough.
In all fairness, we can’t make the claim that Recess is the only new lounge with period artwork and a theme driven into the ground. On September 25, Voyeur lounge opened its doors to 12,000 square feet of “modern meets antique.” A press release defines their name as “a fascinated observer of sordid and scandalous events; a person who derives gratification from observing the acts of others.” Out of curiosity, I looked their name up in my own dictionary: “A person who enjoys seeing the pain or distress of others.”
While we’re not sure how pain and distress translates to a lounge (unless it’s 32 Degrees), Voyeur promises to bring the quality nightlife found in other cities. How? It will feature celebrity hosts, internationally renowned entertainers and fashion-forward clientele. If we’re not mistaken, Recess lounge makes a very similar claim. Let the battle begin!
Recess has a one-up, however. Kanye West’s DJ Aktive spun the club’s opening weekend, in a DJ booth perched above a granite-topped bar in a booth accessible only by ladder—a playground touch that we love. The banquettes are lined with purple accent lights, with the occasional glass-tiled column mak
ing an appearance along curtained walls. Its unisex “restroom” is a long hallway lined with stalls covered in blue tile (an escape from the grays and purples of the bar), complete with an ATM at the end. An elevated booth, secluded by steps and a railing, offers a corner couch and coffee table. Thrillist revealed that a touch-screen computer is being added to the booth to feed Facebook and Twitter addictions, although the lounge’s ventures into either of those sites is lacking to say the least. Isn’t recess all about socializing?
Fabulous amenities like touch-screen computers don’t come cheap, though. Bottle service starts at $250, plus $35 for a “bucket” of six Red Bulls. Vodka selections include Belvedere and Ketel One; the champagne list begins with Moet Chandon. Although membership is reserved for Philly’s elite, a one-year membership is just $20. $75 will buy you VIP status (for invitations to private parties). We squeezed a lot of info out of the club’s reps, but any sort of party schedule remains under lock and key. However, we exclusively lea
rned that October 17 will bring a “huge theme bash” (to be kept very hush-hush), followed by the usual Halloween, pre-Thanksgiving, and New Years bashes.
If Recess delivers on its promise, you and your entourage probably won’t get in next weekend, on Halloween, or on New Years (you might stand a chance at the Thanksgiving bash). That’s where Voyeur comes in. Their culturally attuned spot will be geared towards the masses, so even C-list Philadelphians in Ed Hardy may be admitted. (We’d expect nothing less from a lounge bragging about “reality show princess” guest hosts.) You can expect the same luxuries: bottle service, VIP lounges, phauxlebrities and plasma screen televisions, without the membership laws.
We won’t know how Voyeur stacks up until it opens, and only time will tell if Recess remains the exclusive playground it wants so badly to be. In the meantime, we’ll be saving our pennies for bottle service so we can Tweet about it from a VIP banquette.
Max Kaplan
